why do i write?

writing, especially for drama is an exercise of the heart. of emotion. i think i have a bourgeois mindset, i am too polite, i want good things that i assume that the world is a mom who hugs people who weep and not push them downwards. i see tragedy from the boob tube or the silverscreen. that's why to write from the heart is a hard pursuit. who am i to invent a life people should watch? is writing borne out of masochism or megalomaniac follies? every week you open your heart out and serve them on a silver platter just to get the words and the right emotions out. every week you cry, because of the scene you wrote. and it's all vicarious. it's not as if these things happened to me, but i weep for the tragedy of the character that i am writing for, i weep for the injustices of the world. and when people cry for her, i feel one with her. it's a personal job. it is a job, still. it's all untrue. but there is a lot of you in the program you're writing for. there's a piece of your heart in there. and that's precisely why i write. not to get hurt, not to experience a bigger world, but to feel and to care for something else. who cares if people watch, who cares? i do it precisely because i feel and i share. i invent. i create. is it to get those sleeping lethargic demons out? is the locust of my personality exterior to me? do i write so that i can be proud of myself? or just so people would envy this job, or so that people could be proud of me? no. i don't give a crap about writing to entertain, either. first things first - i write for myself. it is completely selfish. but i write because i want to, i write because i feel. i write because i care and i love.